I came across a box of things my mom had given me that were mine as a baby - things my grandma & great grandmother had made for me. After rediscovering this box I was so excited because they're all things I can use for Ruby. And I came across a quilt my great grandmother had made that I have always loved & even though it smelled a bit musty I laid it out in the backyard & we sat on it. And all of this got me thinking about my great grandmother & how I loved & admired her & how grateful I was for this little piece of her. And how amazing it is to now see my daughter with something that has been in the family for a while now.
I've been thinking about the woman I called great grandmother ever since & how I was still young when she passed away but I remember crying & feeling a sense of loss for the first time. And I totally forgot until recently that she had adopted her daughter. I so badly would love to talk to her all about her experiences & know her thoughts & feelings. All of this reaffirmed to me that we aren't put with our families by accident. We're bound by ties that draw us to one another although sometimes we may not know until years later. I've always known that I loved my great grandmother but now I feel like maybe we were even kindred spirits, born years apart. And I can still draw from her strength & goodness & seek to create parts of her within myself.
I've been thinking about the woman I called great grandmother ever since & how I was still young when she passed away but I remember crying & feeling a sense of loss for the first time. And I totally forgot until recently that she had adopted her daughter. I so badly would love to talk to her all about her experiences & know her thoughts & feelings. All of this reaffirmed to me that we aren't put with our families by accident. We're bound by ties that draw us to one another although sometimes we may not know until years later. I've always known that I loved my great grandmother but now I feel like maybe we were even kindred spirits, born years apart. And I can still draw from her strength & goodness & seek to create parts of her within myself.
