Meeting For the First Time

We were pretty overcome with emotion at the first sight of our baby boy. These children of ours will never fully know what they have meant to us. Every time we try to adopt it feels like we're up against the impossible & yet, here we are, with two kids. I still can hardly even believe it. Our adoptions have been such a sacred experience full of every emotion you can imagine. It's always a huge relief once it's over.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 We loved every minute we got to spend with Noah in the hospital. His sweet birth mother had some serious complications & she was absolutely amazing from start to finish. I was so in awe of her strength & the undeniable love she has for Noah. I knew I would love each one of our babies but I never knew how much I would love their birth mothers. It's a bond that runs deep & it makes me so grateful for the miracle of adoption. The thought came to me again & again that she never could have made such a selfless decision if her love for him hadn't been perfect. I love that he comes from such strength & will have a part of her in him. He is such a lucky & loved boy. She has given us the most beautiful, perfect gift that we will forever be grateful for. Noah has been a dream baby & has the sweetest spirit about him. I feel like he's brought a special peace to our home & has overflowed our hearts with love. And I'm loving that we keep getting this babies with chubby cheeks & brown hair! He's the perfect addition to our family & has stolen all of our hearts.



Noah

 

Noah Andrew Danielson

7 lbs 13 oz

19 1/2 inches

1:34 a.m.

Sept 6, 2013

 

 

He's finally here! It's still hard to believe & it doesn't all feel real quite yet. As I sit trying to write about this experience I can't help but feel like my words could never do it justice. I remember feeling the same way with Ruby. It's hard to describe the intensity of the emotions, the ups & downs, & beautiful, miraculous process that is adoption. I just feel overwhelmed with gratitude. We adore our baby boy & his beautiful birth mother. I'm working on putting his story together & getting it on this blog but for now I'll just say that we are loving having this sweet baby in our home. He truly is a dream come true.

 



A Birthday for Ruby

Today Ruby turned 2! She woke me this morning as she stood beside my bed & said, "Birthday! Birthday!" We spent the day celebrating & had so much fun. She was sweet & silly & animated & had some very "2" moments. I snuck into her room after she fell asleep & as I watched her sleep I said a prayer of thanks that she's mine.

All accessories done by Ruby ;)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And per our birthday tradition here are some things that I want her to remember:

1. You are so, so loved. No matter what you do, your dad & I will always love you.
2. Get out & see the world. If you have the chance, take it. Travel is good for the soul.
3. Read, read, read. Especially the classics.    

4. Be a peacemaker. If in doubt, always be kinder than you feel.

5. Not all that glitters is gold.



Alive

There are lots of days as a mom where time moves slowly & the days seem monotonous & the work rather tedious. But in the midst of it all I often feel a sense of panic as I grasp just how quickly these days are passing right before my eyes. And I ask myself, "Are you taking it all in? Are you living in the moment? Are you really seeing things as they are?" Because I think when all is said & done, these will be times in my life that I'll remember as some of the very best days. I feel like raising & nurturing a little human being has brought an awareness to me that I've never had before. I feel like I see the little details, experience the weather, & really understand the excitement of this world that is all around me. And therein lies the beauty of motherhood. It asks so much of you but in return you're given a new set of eyes to see this world through.

 

 

And seriously, when did my baby grow up?!

 



 



On Gratitude

Ruby's birth parents Jeremy & Cassie came down from Utah this weekend to visit. We spent the day with them on Saturday & had a great time. It's been almost 2 years since placement & I can't believe all that's happened in that time. Spending time with them this weekend & seeing them love Ruby made me really happy. Happy that we all have a healthy relationship that I'm really proud of & happy that Ruby has them in her life. When Tyler & I first began the adoption process I was positive that we would have relatively closed adoptions. Openness scared me to death & made me feel insecure about my role as a mother. I never would've believed that my opinion would have changed so completely. When I tell people about it I see their eyes slightly widen & get the, "Oh, that's nice..." response. And I totally understand because I would have said the exact same thing. It took some time for me to navigate this whole adoption thing & how it works with openness & what's best for my family. And I think each adoption will be that way to a certain extent. But as I looked at Jeremy & Cassie this weekend I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for them. I love those two with my whole heart & I love seeing them so happy. They've been so, so good to us.

They got married this summer in the Salt Lake Temple & are so happy. Ruby has been such a miracle baby for all of us & both of them have told me that they still know that placing Ruby with us was the best decision. If I've learned anything from all of this it's that life often doesn't go as planned & sometimes that's a really good thing. I think we're all really grateful for this unplanned part of our lives that has taught us a better way to love.

 



We're Ready!

We finished the nursery & are feeling ready for the baby to come! It took Ruby several weeks to work up the courage to ride on his rocking horse. That girl is nothing if not cautious. I can relate to her on so many levels. I had a small baby shower with family & got the most adorable baby boy gifts. All this boy stuff is just so much fun. It's such a contrast from all the girl stuff our home has been filled with the past 2 years & I feel like we're getting the best of both worlds. I'm so excited to see Ruby as a big sister & have a brand new baby in our home. I feel like it's exactly what all of us need.



Ruby's Happy Place