I sent you off to preschool even though you begged me not to make you go. When you woke up you were so excited to wear your new backpack & smiled with delight as you wore it for the first time. I let you wear your favorite pants - the black & white striped leggings that I keep meaning to either hide or throw away. You cried the whole way there even though you were trying so hard to pull it together. I told you all about how much fun you would have & what a nice teacher you have & how much you would learn. I put on a happy face & told you how excited I was for you, but what you didn't know is that underneath it all, a part of my heart was breaking. Breaking for you & your anxiety for the unknown, & breaking for me as I realized this was the first of many good-byes to come. I know that you going to preschool is hardly something to get heartbroken over, but it wasn't so much that. It was the realization that my time with you is going by in the blink of an eye & I haven't even gotten my fill of you. The house felt especially quiet that first day & I kept wondering how you were doing & hoped that you were having fun. When I went to pick you up, you immediately jumped up & said, "Mommy!!! I was so brave! I did it!" & you ran into my arms. As we walked hand in hand to the car you told me all about preschool & your excitement was bubbling over. I was so proud of you & was so happy that you liked it. You are awesome! But for the record, I'm not a fan of this growing up business.
I love you,
Mom
